Monday, April 2, 2012

It's Been A Long Time... Farewell, my shining light!

I can’t believe I haven’t been on here for such a long time... I had to step away from my blog for a little while as a lot of things were happening and something had to take a back seat! I needed to sort my head out and now things have calmed down.

Farewell, my shining light..
Every so often we want to express our gratitude to and honour our parents, because if it were not for them, we would not have been who we are.

My mother passed away 2 months ago. I want to honour her for many reasons lately, mainly because it was her birthday and she was in my thoughts a lot in the last few weeks. My mother was a Superwoman. She was AMAZING. When she was in her 40s, she had a liver disorder, some surgery, some time in the hospital, and a recovery. After that, in her late 40s, she had a valve repair surgery. She had a lung infection during the second day of chinese new year last year, and followed by an angioplasty in the mid year. Imagine multiple operations, tubes in her side, morphine hallucinations. Modern-day feminists would have been horrified by Mom’s lifestyle. Her day-to-day world consisted primarily of cooking, shopping, keeping her home running smoothly and, above all, taking care of her children ( sending the three of us to school in  different schools and tuition centers). I think she just assumed that these were the most important things in every woman’s life. I have so much appreciation for my mom, now even more so after she had gone. Mainly for the things that she passed on to me – faith, values, hospitality, love for people, work ethics and my passion to create things. My mother was gifted in designing and although she never pursued it as a career, we still have her sketches to treasure. She always believed that we should be able to “show” what we have achieved at the end of the day. Maybe that is what motivated me to do what I am doing today – creating dresses.

My mother was not only creative, she cared deeply for people. She always had someone that she was reaching out to up to the end of her life and she lived a simple life and didn’t care much for material posessions. We sometimes had to tell her that she should be less frugal with her money – we tried to persuade her to travel, buy more decent food or to sometimes buy something new for herself, but it was hard for her not to be the person that she was – someone with simple tastes and a deep love for her Creator. 

When the phone rang at 6 a.m., first day of Chinese New Year, I knew before I answered it what it meant. After more than a decade of a life-threatening medical condition, I believe my mom, who never once talked about dying, finally decided it was time to go. At her advanced age, I never thought it would be difficult for me to accept her departure. How wrong I was. It’s hard for me to process the fact that I will never see her or hear her voice again. An integral part of my life is now gone forever. She passed away in her own bed, in her own home peacefully..

Farewell, my shining light.

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